I was born for this precise moment. No other purpose was pertinent or worthy of this call. If the final curtain was suddenly to come down on my life at this juncture, I am saddened beyond all reason. Sad but not despairing, I was able to justify my entire existence with but one act. All of these years of standing in the shadows, sidelined with mountains of self doubt about every facet of my life. Existence was my creed, hedonism my faith and immediate gratification my God. There were no actual days to my life, just one obscene, massive non-event chopped into equal bits by serrated bouts of restless sleep. Now at this awakening or rather upon this revelation which has come to me mere moments before the stroke of midnight, better to be tardy than to be a complete no show. This is not a swan song but exaltation bereft of regret and filled with joy.
…If the end is close by then alas…for life is sweet.
“It is a far, far better thing I do than I have ever done; it is a far, far better rest that I go to than I have ever known.”
~Charles Dickens, A Tale of two Cities~